Today was my last visit to my new moms group. Next week is my birthday, and the hubby has offered to take the afternoon off to spend it with me, so today is it. I almost didn't make it at all- Maddy took a monster nap and didn't wake up until 30 minutes before it started. I had just enough time to feed her, change her and race there and only be a few minutes late.
It's bittersweet for me this afternoon in many ways. In talking to the doctor, I realize while I've learned a lot from him, there is more to do. Finding a balance between just enjoying my baby's company regardless of sleep habits and feeding her needs for regular sleep patterns takes dedication, and some sacrifices of time spent with her. If I were truly following the doctors advice, there would be less walks during nap time, and a much earlier bedtime. This will enable her to be less fussy, and perhaps improve her growth habits. While I know it's the right thing to do, the thought of putting my baby to bed at 6PM once I return to work feels like a great sacrifice. I discuss her current sleep habits with the doctor and he points out that because she has a later bedtime, her naps are also not tuned right and she is over tired. I know this is true, but am not sure how to change it with daycare looming just days away. While I know I should get her into a routine soon, I know a routine is going to be forced on us in a matter of days, so why not continue to enjoy our schedule until then?
As for my friends, many of the familiar women are there, and looking around it is great to see how much we've all grown over the last few months, and how we've helped each other. Each of us seems more comfortable in our new role as mother, and have bonded with and understand our babies more. We're also familiar with each others babies, and know each others issues with sleep, nursing, tummy time, etc. There is a real sense of camaraderie among us, and I'm sad that I won't continue to see these women on a weekly basis. We've exchanged emails, and many have become friends - one will even be attending the same daycare. But there is still a sadness as I feel a door closing, as this chapter of maternity leave ends.
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