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Friday, May 31, 2013

The Midpoint (Week 6, Day 3)

Day 3: (The Midpoint):

Today marks the halfway point of my maternity leave. I can't believe the time is going so fast! It seems like just yesterday we brought Maddy home from the hospital. As if to mark the date in black ink, I had my 6 week postpartum appointment to make sure I have fully recovered from the pregnancy. I have been so focused on Maddy and her growth that I'd mostly forgotten that I was still in the healing process as well. It felt good to see the doctor and get a clean bill of health, and the green light to begin working out and doing normal activities again. Beyond breastfeeding and it's implications, I'm back to my pre-pregnancy body.

I feel like the rest of the time is going to go by in a wink of an eye, and before I know it I'll be juggling my work schedule with my mommy schedule. While I know I want to return to work, I also know I want to spend time with my daughter when she's awake - as she'll start to go to bed between five and seven PM most days, that doesn't leave me a lot of time after a long day of work to see her with her eyes opened.

Somehow, I'm going to have to find a balance that works for me. The challenge that I have as I think about the end of maternity leave, starting daycare for Maddy and returning to work, is that I know I could easily enjoy being a stay at home Mom, or being a career woman with kids, and the truth is I want BOTH. I have been part of the workforce since I was fifteen, and the fact is I enjoy working. And I'm good at my job. No, I'm not a CFO or head of some major company, but I work hard, get the job done, and am counted on as a significant contributor within my workplace. And I provide a good component of our families income, something I'm proud of. These are all things I want to continue to do, not only for myself but as a role model for my children. However, I know I could spend every day with my daughter, and know that I would relish the time caring for her, and taking care of our home and family needs.

I haven't figured out yet what balance is going to work for me, and how I'll manage making the balance a reality. But I've got to start figuring it out soon, and I can only hope that when I do begin to balance mommyland and a career, there will be just as many (if not more) laughs than their are tears.

 Maddy and Mommy at the maternity leave midpoint